Do not make small problems become big problems. The author dedicates this book to his daughters: Jazzy and Kenna, who remind his father every day, “Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff”. So we will learn to accept life with the least resistance possible. Featured picture credited to Snappa.
As taught by Zen philosophy, when we learn to let it go rather than holding it with a vengeance, life will begin to flow. We’re going to change things to do improvements. We are going to accept things that can not be changed. And we have the wisdom to know the difference.
If we try this strategy, we will learn the rules of harmony:
1. Do not sweat the small things.
2. It’s all small stuff.
Put this idea into our lives to create a more peaceful and loving life.
How To Apply The Principle Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff?
1. Do Not Sweat The Small Things
We often troubling things that if we observe more deeply, is not a big problem. For example, if there are people who overtake our vehicle. Rather than leaving it and go on, we convince ourselves that we have right to be angry. Many people tell this incident to others and not forget it. So many people spend their energy to “sweat the small stuff”. The result is they completely lose touch with the magic and beauty of life.
2. Make peace with imperfection
It does not mean that we no longer need to try our best. But there is a positive side of not getting too attached and fixated on what is lacking in our life. Remove ourselves from the perfectionist behavior. Once we manage to get rid of the desire to be perfect in every area of life, we will find the beauty in our life.
3. People who are relaxed and gentle are able to achieve higher performance
Why are most of us always in a hurry, anxious and competitive? Life is not an emergency.We are afraid if we become people who are more quiet and gentle, then we can not reach our goals. We are afraid that we’re going to be a lazy and ignorant person.
In reality what happens is the opposite. Fear and a frantic mind require tremendous energy. They decrease our creativity and motivation. When we are full of anxiety and turmoil emotion, we lose our greatest potential. Not to mention the loss of enjoyment of life.
The author is lucky to be surrounded by people who are very relaxed and calm. These people are authors of bestseller books, loving parents, consultants, computer experts, and CEOs. They are very determined to do and master their jobs.
The authors found an important lesson. When we have inner peace we will not be too bothered by our wants, needs, dreams, and problems. So it is easier to concentrate and achieve our goals.
4. Be careful of the snowball effect of our mind
Control your mind. Have you ever noticed how tense we are when we are chased by our mind? If we focus on the little things that make us angry or frustrated, we will feel more uncomfortable. One thought adds to other thought and so on. Until we will find it very stresful.
5. Be Caring
To care means to empathize with others. Try to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes. Imagine how it feels if we have difficulties that are experienced by the person.
We can develop the “caring sense” by training ourselves. To do this we need two things: INTENTION and ACTION.
As Mother Teresa said: “Not everyone can do great things in this world, but everyone can do small things with great love.”
6. Remind ourselves that when we die, our task list will never be empty
There will always be people who need to be phoned, the project to be completed, and the work to be done. The question is: Is the long list of tasks the important factor that determines our success? That would mean no time for ourselves.
Nothing is more important than the feeling of happiness and peace of mind for us and our loved ones. If we are obsessed with solving everything, we will not get a sense of wellbeing. The purpose of life is not to solve all the tasks but to enjoy every step of the life journey and feel a life that is full of love.
7. Do not cut another person’s speech
This behavior damaged the respect and affection of others. This makes the person who was talking become tense, annoyed and irritated. One thing that causes people to be offended is the people who do not want to listen to what other people have to say. How can we listen to him if we are talking?
Let other people finish their sentence before you start to speak. You’ll soon see how your interactions with others will be much improved. They will feel more relaxed because they feel that you listen to them. You will enjoy the conversation and not be in a hurry to finish it. This is one way to become more relaxed and more fun.
8. Help others and do not tell anyone about it
Most of us often help others, but almost always tell that to others. We want to get a confession from them that we are good people. Despite all the good behavior, we will feel the very happy feeling if we do things that are attentive but not tell anyone.
We will always feel comfortable when giving something to others. Rather than the positive feeling reduced because we tell other people, better if we keep it to ourselves so that we will get all the positive feelings.
9. Let other people enjoy the pride
There is something magical in the human soul. A sense of calm surrounding them if they are no longer in need of any kind of attention directed at themselves. Let others get the attention. An excessive need for attention is part of our ego that says, “Look at me. I am different. My story is definitely more interesting than your story.”
Ego is part of us that wants to be heard, seen, appreciated, considered to be special, often at the expense of others. That is the part of us that likes to interrupt other’s conversation and is impatient to wait for our turn to speak.
10. Learn to live in the present
How we are able to live in the present moment determines the peace of our mind. Regardless of what happened yesterday or last year, and may happen or not happen tomorrow, today is the place where we are, always!
Many people live as if their lives are the rehearsal of shows that will be aired later. The fact is nothing can guarantee that we will be here tomorrow. Now is the only time that we have, and the only time that we can control.
When we put our attention to now, we can drive away the fear from our minds. We fear of what happens in the future if we do not have the money, our children life will be difficult, we will grow old and die and so on. Practice keeping our attention at the current time and here. Our business will bring great results.
11. Imagine every person is enlightened except us
The idea is to imagine that every person we meet has experienced enlightenment. All, except us! You probably would not think how fun and easy this strategy is. What we are doing is changing the perception of “Why the hell people behave so?” to “What will they teach me?” So, today pay attention to people who are enlightened around us.
12. Give the opportunity for others to claim that they are “right”
One of the key questions we should ask ourselves is, “Do I want to be right or do I want to be happy?”. Often the two are stand-alone.
The sincere and good strategy to become more calm and loveable is to give other people a chance to be right. Give others a sense of pride. Reduce correcting people. People around us will no longer be defensive and love us more.
They will appreciate us more than we ever imagined. We will discover the pleasure of participating and witness the happiness of others. It is far more profitable than having ego conflict.
13. Be more patient
Our patience is tested along with our efforts to achieve the goal of being the quiet and affectionate person. The more patient we are, the more we are able to accept life as it is. We can not force the life that we want. Without patience, we will make our life very frustrating. Read more about “99 Ways To Be Happier Every Day” here.
14. Practice patience
Patience is a quality that can be developed with training. We may deal with children, boss, or a difficult situation. Without patience, the same event can be a full emergency situation. It will be full of shouting, frustration, broken hearts, and hypertension. This is not useful at all. Do not to sweat the small stuff. Fixing our patience level is a big step to get started.
15. Be the first party to approach
So many of us insist to keep the dislike feeling that could be the beginning of a fight, misunderstanding, anger, or other painful moments. We insist on waiting for others to approach us. We believe that this is the only way that will allow us to forgive or rekindle a friendship or family relationship.
We must understand that being right is never more important than to make ourselves happy. The way to be happy is to let it go and start talking first. Let others be correct. This does not mean we are guilty. All will be fine.
16. Ask yourself: is this problem going to be an important issue next year?
Although this can not solve all the problems, this can give us the large number of perspective that we need. The author found himself laughing at things he had treated seriously before. Rather than spending our energy to be mad, we can use the energy to spend our time with our family or do creative things.
17. Accept the fact that life is not fair
We tend to pity others and ourselves. Pity is an emotion that does not give a benefit to anyone. This emotion makes people feel worse than before.
When we realize that life is not fair, we will care about others and ourselves. The concern is a sincere emotion that delivers loving kindness to everyone it touches. When we find ourselves thinking that there is no justice in this world try to remind ourselves of the fact. We will release ourselves from self-pity.
18. Let ourselves get bored
The benefits of doing nothing is that it teaches us to clear our mind and relax. It gives an opportunity to our minds the freedom to “do not know” for a moment. Like the body, the mind also needs a break from busy activities. Let our minds at rest. The mind will be back stronger, sharper, more focused and creative.
19. Decrease our tolerance to stress
Recognize the signs of stress at the time it appears, before we can not control the stress. When our mind is moving too fast, that’s the time to back off and get back in our direction. When overwhelmed with our schedule, that’s a sign that it’s time to slow down.
We should re-evaluate what is important rather than drain the energy to do all that is on the list of tasks. Prevent ourselves from too much stress early before it gets out of control.
We do not have to worry that we will not be able to complete our responsibility. When the mind is clear, calm, and the stress level reduced, we would be more effective and happy. If we reduce the level of tolerance to stress, we will find that we have very little stress to deal with.
20. Write an expression of love once a week
This training’s purpose is to help people become more relaxed and pleasant. Setting aside a few minutes each week to write letters of affection will be very meaningful for us. Take a pen or type with the computer. It will give enough time for us to remember those who are very good to us throughout our lives.
96. Be open to “What is”
Open our hearts to what exists rather than forcing life to go on as we would like it to be. Most of our inner conflicts stem from the desire to control life. We insist that life should be different from the existing one. Life is not always what we want it to be. The more resigned we are to this truth, the greater the peace that exists in our minds.
97. Think of our own affairs only
This is not a recipe to not helping others. Rather, it focuses on when we should help and when we should leave the person alone. This will make our lives simpler.
98. Find out the extraordinary of the usual stuff
When we look for something extraordinary from the usual everyday things, we can train ourselves to be able to see it. So much to be grateful for, so much to admire. Life is precious and extraordinary.
What are your thoughts on the tips from this book? Have you practiced it in your daily life? What tip is the most difficult to be applied? Please write your comment and I will be more than happy to reply your comment.
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